WILMM: lead me

Why I love my man reason #20
My boyfriend is pretty introverted and shy. He has a servant's heart and I am so grateful for that.  The following statments sum him up pretty well, "Still waters run deep" and "actions speak louder than words." Because he is so quiet there are times when he will say or do something that just blows me away. A couple of weeks ago my sweet boyfriend posted this song on his facebook with the following comment, "I love this song cause it reminds us men that we need to remember that we are suppose to be there to help lead our families spiritually. This is a good thing to think about for all of us without families yet so that we can use this time to help prepare ourselves to help led them. Summation: Learn it now so we can pass it on and not regret not being able to share more with our families." (I especially love the summation :D)
I was touched at the depth of this song because it is so true. I am not married yet but I desire a godly husband who will lead me. I was even more touched that this is my boyfriend's prayer.

On Easter we went to a sunrise service that our beautiful Bible study did together. We went to a local canyon and climbed to the top of this little hill and watched the sun rise, it was beautiful. For our little service one of the families made crosses out of popsicles and each person took a cross. On our crosses we wrote what was on our mind. Some wrote about the beauty of God in nature, others about Easter, some their favorite Bible verse or a popular song lyric.

We went around and talked about what we had written and why. It was beautiful and moving. My sweet boyfriend wrote on his cross, "Lead me". Words cannot express the love that I have for this man. It is humbling and beautiful to know that the man I will commit my life to is committing his life to Jesus so that he will be a better future husband and father.

If I know that my husband is being lead by God I can follow him anywhere.

1,000 gifts list #895-905

I celebrated my birthday and Easter this past week. It was beautiful. I recognize more and more how very blessed I am, how undeserving I am of His love, how merciful and gracious He is. Fighting to keep my eyes open to His love and continuing to scratch out my list of gifts one at a time...
895) wonderful boyfriend of four years, still walks me to my car :)
896) cloudy birthday skies
897) a room full of kids perfectly imperfectly singing happy birthday
898) dinner with Jason and Daddy
899) Marlene and her sweet family creatively singing me happy birthday from 1800 miles away
900) black starling finding grubs in the grass
901) flowers underneath back porch window, all in bloom!
902) renewed arboretum pass
903) amazing grace! The fact that it pleased God to have His fullness dwell in Him...even to the point of the cross!
904) sunrise Easter service- He is risen!
905) a boyfriend who desires to be led by Christ and then subsequently be a godly leader himself

why thankfulness really matters (1,000 gifts list #s 876-885)

It was April fool's day that the heartbreaking news reached our ears. My parents and I had just gotten home from Bible study, a study about giving thanks in every season of our life, no matter what the circumstance. The message machine was beeping and my mom pressed the play button and our world changed. The voice of my Grandpa filled the room and his straight forward words, "I have some pretty bad news. I have stomach cancer." felt like a punch in the gut. The mind races to four years ago when a similar call from my Grandma, his wife, came and we learned she had brain cancer. She went to be with Jesus not six months later.As my mom and I held each other and cried she whispered these words to me, "give thanks, give thanks."


In that moment giving thanks was the last thing I wanted to do. Giving thanks was no where on my radar. I felt bitterness and anger welling up inside of me, my own cancer, eating away at my soul. We cried. We talked a bit. My parents went to bed. 


I know the cure to bitterness and anger. I know it because I've been practicing it for over a year. But you see, the cure is not a magic pill you take once and the cure lasts forever. No, it's a practice. A daily practice. Much like physical exercise once you stop the muscles lose their strength. It's a cure that only works if it is practiced daily.

My mom and I had both just finished reading Ann Voskamp's book 1,000 Gifts.  We each have a gratitude journal but I knew that this practice would help everyone in our family, not just my mom and I. I also knew that there was no way that my brothers would just start writing in a journal if I gave them one. I needed somewhere where our family could practice eucharisteo together. Iron sharpens iron and this practice of giving thanks with each other can only help to heal the broken pieces inside of us and isn't life just easier when we do things together?


So I choose a spot in our house where everyone frequents and I take a long roll of butcher paper. I choose a verse that fits where my family is in the here and now and write it on top, along with some quotes from Ann and these simple instructions, "giving thanks, all of us, together, one by one."

 

I scratch out a couple of gifts on the list, mostly just to demonstrate what I mean, and as I write, as I am forced to think of the ways He loves my heart is lightened. I think I am beginning to see that all IS grace. With that recognition I am able to understand more fully the words of that famous song, "amazing grace, how sweet the sound..."

I am overjoyed as I watch the list grow. I love that it is on our fridge and I also love that those who are not in our family feel free to add to the list. 

I replaced the paper last night. Collectively we had recorded 49 gifts and it was time for a fresh start. I put up a new piece of paper, a new verse and a new quote. And the journey continues because we can never out thank God for the many gifts He's given us!



 My list continued, looking forward to breaking 1,000!


876) the face that the size of the tumor does not determine the presence of the Savior!
877) Jared's music filling the house 
878) clean microwaves
879) blustery days!
880) roses in bloom, everywhere!
881) rain and sun together!
882) Daddy home :)
883) modern day technology
884) grace, grace, always grace
885) so many different people's handwriting on the list :)

How to Make Banket

My boyfriend is 50 percent Dutch. His mom was the dissenter and ruined their pure dutch bloodlines by marrying his dad (and I'm so glad she did!) :D My boyfriend's great grandparents came over from Holland and his Grandma is very proud of the fact she's 100% Dutch. One of the tasty treats that I have come to enjoy is a traditional Dutch pastry called banket (bahn-KET). Banket is an almond paste filled pastry.

So, here's a how-to-make-banket-tutorial :) 


Ingredients for pastry crust                                                 

-4 cups of flour                                                                  
-2 cups of cold butter, cut into small pieces                         
-about one cup of ice water                                               
-1/2 teaspoon of sal
1/2 teaspoon of baking powder

Ingredients for filling
- 2 eggs (you can also use only one egg, we've tried both ways and they both work)
- 2 cups of sugar 
- 1 lb or 2 cups almond paste
- 1 tsp. lemon juice

Bake Temp: 425 degrees F.
Bake Time: 15 minutes

Step number one: cut cold butter up into small pieces. Put flour, butter, salt and baking powder in a large mixing bowl.

Step number two: mix together flour, cold butter, salt and baking powder. The point is not to cream the butter into the flour mixture but to make it a crumbly mixture. My boyfriend's family actually uses frozen butter and has gotten the best results from that. You do not want to over mix your crust. You can use either a mixer or a pastry cutter.

Step number three: Mix in your ice water SLOWLY and only enough so that it starts to form a doughy ball. I would start with 3/4 cup, adding just a little bit at a time. The dough should not be sticky so make sure not to add to much water.

(this isn't actually one cup, it's two. I put ice and water in here then poured one cup into a one cup measurement)

 Once your dough is starting to look like this it is usually easier to mix the rest by hand. You can then add water a little bit as a time as needed.

Step number four: One you have your dough take it and break it into 8 equal balls. The easiest way for me to do this is to take the dough, break it in half and then continue to break those halves in half until I have eight balls.

 If you added to much water and your dough is super sticky you can add a little bit more flour. It also helps to put it in the fridge. You can refrigerate dough for a couple of days or so and it is actually easier to work with when it is colder.


Step number five: For the filling mix together the eggs, almond paste, and lemon juice. We buy our almond paste in 7 gallon cans from Blue Diamond because it is MUCH cheaper then buying the tiny little tubes of almond paste at the grocery store. 

Step number six: Time to roll out the dough! I usually sandwich the dough between lightly floured waxed paper. Roll each ball out so that it measures twelve inches long and four inches wide. If you have not over mixed your dough you should be able to see butter striations in your rolled out dough. I have yet to achieve making perfect dough. My boyfriend's family said they only get the striations when they start with frozen butter so that may be the key. In any case, it doesn't really matter, but, if you get butter striations then bravo! You've done it correctly. :)

Step number seven: Starting from about an inch from the top of the rectangle spoon filling onto the middle of the dough. Leave about an inch or so from the top and bottom of the rectangle.

 Step number eight: Starting with the short sides fold dough up and over filling. Then fold over long sides. Make sure to press seams together and seal tightly. Water can also help to seal seams. If the seams are not sealed tightly you will end up with a bubbly, hot, sticky, almond paste filling mess on your cookie sheet after baking.

  Step number nine: Flip banket over so that the seam side is touching the cookie sheet.

Step number ten: Use a knife and cut evenly spaced diagonal slits along the top of the banket. The slits are used to help release the heat while baking and they also serve as an easy way to break the banket into pieces to share and eat. :)

 

Step number eleven: Brush the top of the banket with either egg whites or milk (I usually use milk that way I don't have to figure out what to do with the extra yolk). Sprinkle with sugar.

 Step number twelve: Bake at 425 degrees farenheit for 15 minutes or until tops are golden brown. 

Wait a little bit for the boiling hot melty insides to cool down a tad and then enjoy!!! :) 

*word of advice- while making banket the traditional way is well worth it, I usually buy pre-made pie crust (shhhh...don't tell my boyfriend's family!) and make it that way and it is still quite tasty* 

**if making this for the first time I recommend cutting the recipe in half...it makes a lot!**